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O’Shae Sibley, Philadanco dancer killed in NYC, gets a final farewell from mourners at The Met

Hundreds of friends and family gathered to remember the Philadelphia native and former Philadanco student who was killed in New York City late last month.

A mourner waits in line to pay respects to O’Shae Sibley The Met in Philadelphia on Tuesday.
A mourner waits in line to pay respects to O’Shae Sibley The Met in Philadelphia on Tuesday.Read moreAllie Ippolito / Staff Photographer / Allie Ippolito / Staff Photograp

At the Met on Tuesday morning, as Vanessa Bell Armstrong’s “Nobody But Jesus” echoed through the former opera house, Onederful Ancrum danced in memory of her friend O’Shae Sibley.

As she fought back tears, Ancrum glided gracefully across the floor, then darted forward powerfully, as if carried by gusts of wind in front of the indigo coffin that held the body of her friend.

One moment she drifted upward. The next, she tumbled to the ground. Then she clasped her hands together as she stood side by side with a banner emblazoned with the image of Sibley, both dancers in arabesque.

It was a farewell to Sibley, who loved dance more than anything. His grand finale.

At the Met on Tuesday morning, hundreds of friends and family of Sibley, 28, the Philadelphia native and former Philadanco student who was killed in New York City last month, gathered for a joyful celebration of his life, trading tears for dancing and song.

Sibley had moved to New York City to pursue a career in dance, eventually becoming a dancer and choreographer at Ailey Extension school at Alvin Ailey American Dance Theater.

Police say a 17-year-old fatally stabbed Sibley the night of July 29 while he and his friends were at a Brooklyn gas station blocks from where he lived. The teen, whom police did not identify, turned himself in Friday and was charged with second-degree murder, authorities said.

Representatives of the Kings County District Attorney’s Office who were at Tuesday’s celebration of life declined to comment, citing an ongoing grand jury investigation.

“We were here to express our sympathies and support the family,” said Joseph Alexis, an assistant district attorney with the office.

Authorities say Sibley and his friends stopped at the gas station on their way home from New Jersey and started playing Beyoncé's “Renaissance” album as they filled up. The group began voguing, a dance created and primarily performed by Black and Latinx LGBTQ people that emulates fashion models and is an integral part of the ballroom scene.

A group of men approached Sibley and his friends and told them to stop dancing and said they didn’t want to see gay men dancing in their neighborhood, authorities said.

The men yelled homophobic and racist slurs at Sibley, who was gay, and his friends, police said. Bystanders tried to help and the group began to leave, except for the teen police say stabbed Sibley.

Video of the stabbing shows the teen stabbing Sibley in the chest, police told the New York Times. When officers arrived, they found Sibley with a stab wound to his torso and he was taken to Maimonides Medical Center, where he was pronounced dead later that night.

Police did not release a motive for the killing, but a hate crimes unit is involved in the investigation.

On Tuesday, speakers who gathered to remember Sibley chose to focus on his life, rather than the circumstances of his death.

They recalled the tall, graceful man who loved building and nurturing community wherever he went and who loved God and his friends. They spoke of Sibley’s unbridled love for dance, one that carried him through the Philadelphia school system, to Temple University, and eventually to New York City.

At Wakisha Charter School, Karen Still-Pendergrass would catch 14-year-old Sibley stealing glances at her dance class, always curious but hesitant to come in, she said. One day, she said, she gave the precocious young boy an ultimatum.

“Listen. You got one more time to come past my door. Because then you’re coming in this room.”

The next time Sibley peered into her class, she said, she invited him in, and made him take off his shoes, roll his pant legs up, and start dancing. He excelled in her class and went on to earn a scholarship at Philadanco, she said.

“From there,” she said proudly, “he just flourished.”

Joined by some of Sibley’s friends, Otis Pena, wearing orange — Sibley’s favorite color — spoke of how his close friend was unapologetic about being himself and encouraged his friends and community to “stand out” and be themselves, even in times of darkness and fear.

Pena was with Sibley the night he was killed, and had pressed on his friend’s wound to stop the bleeding, the Times reported.

“O’Shae was a beacon of light for a lot of us in our community that was engulfed in darkness,” said Pena. “But O’Shae rejoiced. O’Shae was O’Shae.”

During her remarks, Still-Pendergrass announced that Philadanco had created a scholarship fund in Sibley’s name, news that drew rousing applause.

Joan Myers Brown, founder of Philadanco, said she decided to create the fund to encourage boys to pursue dance without having to consider the financial burden of paying for classes.

The fund will be called O’Shae Sibley’s Scholarship for Dance, she said.

“Boys get a hard time when they say let’s take ballet,” she said. “Especially in the Black community, they really don’t want guys to be ballet dancers. But so many of them really want to.”

Outside of the Met, family carried Sibley’s coffin, painted with an image of Sibley dancing, draped in red, into a hearse as they readied for the final procession.

Sibley’s father, Jake Kelly, remembered how much Sibley loved his friends and family, and how much they loved him back, evidenced by the hundreds of people who turned out to honor and remember him on Tuesday. As the line of cars formed to take Sibley’s coffin to Fernwood Cemetery in Lansdowne, his father said it was impossible not to love his son once you met him.

“Everybody really loved him,” his father said. “He was a loving child. He was always about family. He was a loving person. To know O’Shae is to love O’Shae.”