With deepest gratitude

Well, this time I really do have news.

But it’s not bad.

It’s just change.

And remember that change is constant.

Also that the more things change, the more they stay the same.

Anyway, the bottom line is that The Philadelphia Inquirer is revamping its design, and its new redesign will not include “Chick Wit.” So you won’t be able to read “Chick Wit” in the newspaper anymore.

But don’t worry, you don’t have to go without the funny.

I’m revamping, too, and from now on, those of you who read “Chick Wit” in The Philadelphia Inquirer can get the column sent directly to your email.

It’s like room service without the calories.

And it’s free!

All you have to do is go to my website, scottoline.com, and sign up for my humorous newsletter. If you do, every Sunday morning, I’ll send you a humor column, either a new one or a classic.

Plenty of people who don’t get the newspaper already read “Chick Wit” that way, so you’ll be in excellent company.

And to me, this is a form-over-substance distinction, like when people ask me how I feel about people reading books or ebooks. I prefer books because I want bookstores to thrive, but I’m fine if you read my ebooks, too.

It’s like eating chocolate cake on a china plate or a paper plate. Either way, it’s chocolate cake.

And reading is better for you than cake.

I started writing ”Chick Wit” in March of 2007, about 15 years ago, which is incredible because I’m only 30 and I act 12.

I didn’t know what I was doing.

That didn’t stop me.

A column is 700 words, and I write novels, which are 95,000.

I need 298 words to say hello.

But I have a theory. Life is no fun when you know what happens next.

So I jumped in with both feet.

I did that with marriage, but it worked less well.

Anyway, I started writing away this column, and later Francesca joined me, and even though it seems like we may have been writing about ourselves, we always thought it was about you, because we’re like all of you.

And all of you deserve a spotlight.

For example, when I wrote about Mother Mary, many of you emailed me to say that she was like your Mother Bertha, or your Mother Linda, or that your mother was the Jewish Mother Mary or the Irish Mother Mary, and I really felt like I was onto something.

And I wrote about my divorces from Thing One and Thing Two, and then you started emailing me to tell me about your Thing Two and your Thing Four and we all started rocking.

And when Francesca joined the party, she wrote about mothers and daughters, then about moving to New York on her own, and I wrote about being an empty nester missing my daughter, and we basically spilled our estrogen all over the page, so you could read about us and see yourselves.

In fact, when I started this column, I still had my period.

Now I have absolutely no punctuation.

Yay!

None of this means “Chick Wit” is for women only. I get plenty of email from men who read the column, and of course, men like reading about women.

After all, women like reading about men.

Take Bradley Cooper.

I can read about Bradley Cooper all day long, and so could you.

Pictures would be even better, but I digress.

Because I want to say the most important thing ever:

Thank you, all around.

Thank you to The Philadelphia Inquirer for publishing “Chick Wit” for so long. Francesca and I are truly thankful to a great newspaper and our terrific editors.

But our biggest thank-you goes to all of you, our readers.

Thank you so much for reading “Chick Wit.”

We could not be more grateful for your loyalty and your love.

And your sense of humor.

We assure you, we return it all a thousandfold.

We hope you can feel it in these columns, or if we’ve met in person on tour and I tried to stick my tongue down your throat.

So stay with us for the LOLs.

It’s not goodbye, it’s see you next Sunday.