High school math class = love, years later

Danielle Lespinasse and Zach Snyder Lespinasse

Nov. 1, 2020, in Philadelphia, and Nov. 7, 2021 in Audubon, Pa.

Talking with Zach was Danielle’s favorite part of Algebra II Honors. He was smart and funny, and his longish hair reminded her of Tommy on Third Rock from the Sun. Alas, Danielle thought she might as well be crushing on a fictional alien; “Zach dated several girls, but none of them were me,” she said.

Zach could hardly wait to talk to Danielle, either. He can’t say for sure why he didn’t act on that in fall 1999. Then, during the next school year, Zach began a serious relationship that would last for most of their Freehold High careers. Danielle tried to ignore her crushy feelings and focus on their growing friendship. They shared music and went to the movies or roller-skating, often with friends.

Senior year, Zach and his girlfriend broke up. Several months later, he, Danielle, and another friend went bowling. Afterward, she dropped off their friend and offered to show Zach around her part of Freehold. In the parking lot of her old middle school, they danced to Sean Paul’s “Get Busy.”

Zach kissed her.

It was an amazing kiss for both, but Zach felt the timing was bad for a relationship, and a failed relationship would ruin their friendship, too.

“We were going to different schools, very far apart, and it felt like too big a risk,” he said.

The next time they saw each other, Zach said they should remain friends.

In fall 2007, they said goodbye before she left to study psychology at Yale and he to study physics at New Jersey Institute of Technology. After college, Zach moved to D.C. and became a patent agent. Danielle earned a master’s and Ph.D. from the University of Florida. During rare occasions when both were back in Freehold, they caught each other up on lives that included relationships with other people.

In 2016, Danielle, who is now 35, had just landed her first job in Philadelphia and was on a language-learning trip to Colombia. She saw a rare Facebook post from Zach — a photo of him and his mom sitting outside wearing what looked like a hospital bracelet.

“Even though we hadn’t talked in two or three years by then, I felt the urge to reach out to him,” Danielle said. She saw the picture, she told him. She hoped he was doing well. She was back in the Northeast and was sending love to him and his family.

Months earlier, Zach’s mom had had a stroke. He frequently traveled between D.C. and New Jersey to spend nights with her — he, his siblings, and stepfather had a rotation to make sure she was never alone. His mom had more recently been moved to rehab, and this picture was one of the first times she had been outside.

Zach, who is now 36, had already been thinking he needed to move closer to his family. “I didn’t have a plan, I just had an idea,” he said. “But then I got that message from Danielle. It seemed very serendipitous, like maybe this was finally the right time.”

Zach asked if she could get together that Saturday. Danielle was supposed to be on a long layover in Florida, but switched her flight to meet him for dinner in Freehold.

Danielle tried to pay for her half. Zach grabbed the check. He wanted to make his intentions crystal clear. “It’s a date, isn’t it?” he said.

They were long distance for one year. One night at her apartment Zach told her there’s a song that always makes him think of her, even in the years they were out of touch: Sean Paul’s “Get Busy.” With that, she realized he had always liked her, too.

In October 2018, the couple got a place in Old City, which they share with dog Mico. One night, they got out their old yearbooks and read the words each had written to the other. “You’ve always managed to be the best friend I could ever ask for,” wrote Zach. “You’re always there to offer me a helping hand, a listening ear, or a shoulder to cry on. I could never thank you enough for it all ... don’t forget about me.”

Danielle wrote: “If I ever lose you, I’ll never forgive myself, because we’re getting married and doing charity work, right? We’ll leave it to fate.”

In mid-November 2019, Zach lured Danielle out to the pier near Spruce Street Harbor Park with a promise of catching Pokémon. She knew there were no Pokémon, and she was cold. “Why are we out here?” she asked.

Zach knelt, offered her a sapphire ring, and asked her to marry him.

Back at home, Danielle took a small box from its hiding place, knelt, and asked Zach to marry her.

“I love that Zach really gives people his full attention and makes them feel seen and heard,” Danielle said. “I love that he is reflective and trusting. That he loves animals. And that he is very into justice and equality and wanting people to reach their full potential while reducing barriers.” Zach will soon start law school with the goal of becoming a patent attorney. He hopes to help people who lack business experience navigate that system.

Zach said Danielle is one of the most loving people he has ever known. “When I struggle to articulate my feelings, Danielle fills in the gaps for me. Her emotional intelligence and empathy fills me with so much awe. I love the way she sings and dances, the way that she sees the world. And I love her dog.”

The couple sent an engagement photo to their former algebra teacher, Mrs. Valosin.

A Nov. 1, 2020, wedding was planned. When it became clear that COVID-19 would keep them from having the dance party reception they wanted, their vendors agreed to postpone. But the couple also wanted to be legally wed on the date originally planned. Danielle is Haitian, and it was Fet Gede — the Haitian Day of the Dead. “My dad’s mom, my mom’s dad, and my dad’s oldest sister had all passed away within four years of each other,” Danielle said. “This felt like a way for them to be with us.”

Journeys of the Heart officiant Naila Francis married them under a willow tree behind Carpenters Hall — one of the couple’s favorite picnic spots. About 20 people — mostly immediate family — watched as she performed an abbreviated ceremony that included a Celtic handfasting. Naila also led the couple’s longer ceremony on Nov. 7 of this year at the John James Audubon Center in Audubon, where a reception for 85 also was held. The couple saved the exchanging of rings for their second ceremony.

Zach has loved orchards, like the one at Audubon, since working in one as a child. Realizing that Audubon was born in what is now Haiti made it even more auspicious. Instead of cake, they pies, apple cider doughnuts and s’mores. And then everybody danced.

Zach knew Danielle, who feels so connected to past generations of her family, would want to keep her last name. Her grandfather had been a military captain in Haiti and was one of many killed by the Tonton Makout under former President Francois Duvalier. “My grandmother immigrated here with seven children, including my father. She was a force to be reckoned with.” Danielle said proudly. Zach knew and loved her grandmother, too. He is changing his last name to Lespinasse.