Seven lessons from a good (not great) Jersey Shore summer

VENTNOR. — There seems to have been a steep learning curve this summer for some of the newer, in many cases wealthier, Shore visitors who elbowed out longtime visitors for an expensive week down the Shore.

Or maybe it’s just that people seemed paralyzed until they could check their Shore Facebook group for answers. How’s the wind? How’s the heat? The flies? Is the beach open? Where should I get pizza/chicken parm/fried shrimp? What’s that siren I hear?

» READ MORE: Shoobies react: Homeowners are 'out of control'

It was a summer of reckoning for both homeowners and longtime renters, as the booming last few years corrected, and even tourism boosters acknowledged that the summer economic picture was good, not amazing.

To put a bow on it, even as the humidity and calendar (and ocean temps!) keep it feeling a lot like summer, just without the people, here are seven things you learned, or should have learned, at the Shore this summer.

1. You don’t have to know everything before you head to the beach. It’s OK to go with a little uncertainty about what that day’s experience will be like beforehand. There might be flies. There might even be, a little weirdly, spotted lantern flies. If they are really bad, take a quick dip in the ocean and go back home. Then again, there might be a sea breeze. There might be dolphins! There might be time for an ice cream or a walk, ankles in surf.

You can check the weather forecast and the wind direction (west wind is bad) to get a general idea, but it’s OK to see for yourself. Go at different times of the day! Sometimes dusk on the beach will encase you in a magically transcendent pink glow that is really beautiful. Your friends on Facebook might not even know about it! Experience it without photographing it and don’t tell anyone.

2. Don’t count on your favorite food places to stick around or not be threatened with extinction. But never rule out their return either. With real estate in demand, and people wanting housing, a lot of old favorites have gone away. Goodbye LBI’s Mustache Bill’s! Goodbye Sack-o-Subs in Ventnor! Blitz’s in Ocean City … blitzed. And why is Beach Haven still harassing Holiday Snack Bar?

But wait, sometimes they come back! Hello again Sack-o-Subs! Hello again Lil’ Saigon in Northfield! Just don’t get too attached.

3. The beach has gotten political. Beyond the political flags, this summer the anti-wind-turbine-in-the-ocean folks held hands and protests at the beach, planted signs in their front yards and along public medians, and elected officials in Cape May County who welcomed visitors with blinking wheeled-in message boards against ocean wind energy. On Tuesday, six people were arrested in Ocean City for trying to disrupt the start of land-based testing for one of the planned wind farms, the Associated Press reported. The issue smolders on as economic forces compete with clean energy goals and disputed questions about the consequences of the wind turbines. All while the existing energy grid in Wildwood failed multiple times this summer.

» READ MORE: As the U.S. races to build offshore wind power projects, transforming coastlines from Maine to South Carolina, much remains unknown about how the facilities could affect the environment.

4. Local, especially quirky local, is best. Dak Daddy’s Oysters straight out of Ludlam Bay in Sea Isle, Remedee Coffee roasted and sold out of a beach block garage in Atlantic City, all the little places you pass by and think, I should go there. Not the same old places. Go there. And don’t leave your trash behind, or at least appreciate how artist Eduardo Jimémez composes art out of it.

5. What the song “Margaritaville” was actually about. I learned this, finally, when Jimmy Buffett passed away this summer. I read the lyrics for once, and realized, hey he’s singing about me, watching the Shoobies walk by my house. Some of my favorite locals at the Jersey Shore are longtime Jimmy Buffett fans and I realize now, it goes much deeper than saying you’re a Parrothead and being into the music (I don’t hate it, except for his cover of “Brown Eyed Girl!”).

Jimmy Buffett was making fun of the Parrotheads! The true Jimmy Buffett fan goes to the beach, sits in a chair and reads by the surf, eats fresh tuna he’s caught himself, puts booze in the blender or maybe just opens a Bud Light, and raises generations of locals who love the beach as much as he does. Now where’s that salt shaker.

6. Locals don’t automatically love you. Yes, yes, we get it, the economy depends on you and your tax dollars and dinner dollars and ice cream money and never-ending supply of entertaining content for newsletter writers. But that doesn’t mean you aren’t still at times incredibly annoying! You drive too fast, you seem way too stressed, some of you seem comically inexperienced at simply being outside in shorts and sneakers, let alone bathing suits, you yell at baristas, you walk down the middle of the street, you fill up the pickle ball courts, take all the dinner reservations, clutter the beach with canopies, tents, and those flags.

You come in hot, tear down our favorite houses and magnolia trees, then vanish.

7. Don’t go at all? Let’s face it. A lot, and I mean a LOT, of people wrote to me with what they considered to be better options. Like a face-facts Bruce Springsteen ex-fan, these people were heartbroken but reconciled to a future without the Shore. They heaped praise on the Poconos, Italy, North Carolina, celebrity-doused Martha’s Vineyard, and the like. Meanwhile Taylor Swift was hanging around Beach Haven, and Megan Fox and Machine Gun Kelly were getting smoothies at the Healthy Hippo in Ventnor. So there. See you next year.