Girls’ High denied a graduate her diploma because she danced across the stage
A Girls High official told Hafsah Abdul-Rahman, "You’re not getting your diploma because you made the crowd chuckle,’” the recent graduate said.
Philadelphia High School for Girls has 175 years’ worth of proud traditions, including its graduation, where young women dress in white, carrying flowers.
This year, as in years past, students were given a warning prior to their Friday ceremony at the Kimmel Center: Tell your families no cheering, shouting, or clapping when you walk across the stage to accept your diploma.
Hafsah Abdul-Rahman, 18, was keenly aware of the restriction. As she waited for her name to be called, she even looked at her proud family and put her finger to her lips as a reminder.
Graduation was especially meaningful to Abdul-Rahman, who had endured a year of health challenges and felt she was collecting her diploma not just for herself, but also for her sister, Aisha, who was killed in 2014, at age 14, by gun violence.
When Abdul-Rahman walked across the stage, she did so silently, but with style — doing the Griddy, with a big smile.
When she reached Girls’ High principal Lisa Mesi, Abdul-Rahman reached for her diploma, only to be rebuffed. “She said, ‘You’re not getting your diploma because you made the crowd chuckle,’” Abdul-Rahman said.
Stunned, she kept walking, but “I was humiliated,” said Abdul-Rahman. “You only get one moment like that, and it was taken away from me.” She eventually received her diploma after a family member confronted another Girls’ High official, who initially refused to hand it over.
After Abdul-Rahman’s grandmother posted a video of her granddaughter’s walk across stage on social media, hundreds of people weighed in. Reaction was mixed — some staunch defenders of Girls’ High traditions insisted that rules are rules, and administrators were right to stick to them. Others said the rule is outdated and insensitive to Black culture.
“Stop policing Black joy,” said Keziah Ridgeway, a Girls’ High graduate and current district social studies teacher. “In a time period where you have so many of our children dying, not graduating, this is something to be celebrated.”
Ridgeway believes in rules, but “as an educator, there sometimes has to be a bend,” she said. “We don’t know what these kids have to fight through to get to the point they’re at. We have to give grace.”
In an statement Wednesday night to The Inquirer, the Philadelphia School District said: “During Friday’s Girls’ High graduation, the school administration chose to give a few graduates their diplomas directly after graduation versus on the stage due to the school’s graduation guidelines. The district does not condone the withholding of earned diplomas based on family members cheering for their graduates. We apologize to all the families and graduates who were impacted and are further looking into this matter to avoid it happening in the future.”
Abdul-Rahman remains confused.
She and her mother, Jaszmine Reid, feel that Abdul-Rahman was targeted — other girls waved, or blew kisses, or made other silent gestures as they walked across the stage. In fact, Abdul-Rahman said, an assistant principal told the girls to walk across the stage in style just before graduation began.
And though someone did laugh as Abdul-Rahman sashayed across the stage, her family was quiet; they are furious not just at the policy, but also that she’s being penalized for someone else’s reaction.
“With the climate in the city of Philadelphia, these kids have lost so much,” said Renee Haniyah Reid, Abdul-Rahman’s grandmother. “The dynamics have changed. And my granddaughter wants to be an entrepreneur; if she’s not going to college, this was her last walk. They told me, ‘Oh, well, she’ll get over it.’”
Saleemah Burch, 18, also had to walk off the stage without her Girls’ High diploma.
No noise was audible in a video provided to The Inquirer, but Burch did flip her hair and made a brief gesture with her hand as she walked across the stage. In the video, her mother, Delsa Burch, whispers, “Why she didn’t get her paper? Why she didn’t get her diploma?”
Saleemah Burch said Mesi told her, “I’m sorry, I love you so much, but one of your family members clapped.” She was confused; she had told her family not to make noise, and they didn’t, but she moved on, she said, because she didn’t want to make a scene or ruin anyone else’s experience.
She said she’s just sad. “I worked so hard to get that diploma,” she said.
Delsa Burch was livid; Saleemah is the youngest of her 10 children. And though Burch was not able to graduate from high school herself, seeing her daughter collect a diploma she earned despite the family experiencing homelessness for part of her high school years was meant to be a high point.
She tried to make the best of a bad situation, Burch said. After she, too, argued with staff to get her daughter’s diploma, Burch made a big fuss over her daughter. But it wasn’t the same, she said.
“Why would you deny her the privilege of receiving her diploma on stage? We got all the way to this point, and they turn her away? It’s like saying, ‘You’re not good enough,’ and that’s not fair,” said Burch.
On Wednesday, the assistant superintendent who oversees Girls’ High sent both Delsa Burch and Jaszmine Reid an email asking to speak with them by phone.
“I am sorry to hear about your daughter’s and your family’s experiences at the ceremony,” assistant superintendent Ted Domers wrote to the mothers.
Dana Carter was part of a group of Girls’ High alumnae who led the 2023 graduates into the ceremony. The educator and member of the Racial Justice Organizing Coalition often speaks for marginalized students, but in this case, she said the traditions are important, and she believes the administrators did not err.
“I’m definitely about rules and regulations, and following the guidelines that have been set forth by the authorities that were in charge,” Carter said. And though she personally would not have embarrassed Abdul-Rahman and Burch, Carter said, sticking to consequences is key.
“I am so sorry that child had a rough year,” Carter said. “But this is the school she picked. We’ve got to stop giving our babies outs. When we don’t hold them to standards or hold them accountable for what they do, then they will continue to do whatever they want out in these streets.”