Our children are killing each other, and all of us must do something about it

Our children kill each other as they travel to and from school.

Think about that for a moment. Our children kill each other as they travel to and from school.

As someone whose only child was an innocent bystander killed by armed assassins at a high school football game in 2022, I am sickened by the horrific daily acts of violence in our city — especially last week, when 11 children were shot in or near public transit.

I am exhausted. And outraged, because the response from our city, state, and national leaders is unacceptable.

I am exhausted. And outraged.

After two gunmen shot five people at a North Philadelphia bus stop after school on March 4, killing high school student Dayemen Taylor, Kevin Bethel, the new police commissioner and former chief of school safety at the School District of Philadelphia, said at a news conference that even though someone was killed, many more people could have been hurt, given how crowded the area was at the time.

“We’re never fortunate when we lose a child — in particular, a 17-year-old — but if you look around here — how busy this intersection is — a day care across the street, multiple people on the bus, and multiple rounds being fired, it could have been much worse,” Bethel said.

Five people were also shot at Roxborough High School when my son, Nick, was killed, and the word fortunate never crossed my mind. The measure of our fortune is now that day cares are not close enough to be riddled with bullets?

After Nick was shot, there was a strong police presence at Roxborough High School football games. But where was it on the day of my son’s death? Why are we constantly in a state of reactionary thinking? Is there not a single leader in this city who is able to think outside the box?

Why is in-person instruction still happening? Why is SEPTA still running? This is a state of emergency.

Why is SEPTA still running?

But the burden of public safety does not rely solely on our leaders. We each have a stake, and it’s beyond time that we all play our part.

It’s convenient and comfortable to turn away from the violence you see on the news because you don’t feel any connection to this issue. But for me, and the thousands of other Philadelphia parents whose children have been shot, we don’t have that luxury. The 11 families who were added to our ranks last week have been thrust into a world of violence and ugliness. A world where parents raise murderers, who are protected by their extended family and loved ones.

Although at least two arrests have been made in a shooting that took place at Northeast High School on Wednesday, many shooters still remain at large. People help them survive underground. Provide for them. Take pride in not “snitching.” This city glorifies bad behavior. Would you wear a T-shirt that says “snitches get stitches” if your loved one were murdered?

It’s not enough to concentrate on your own children if other children do not feel the love and support your kids feel. Nick died because six people — five shooters and one driver, most teenagers — gave no thought to firing more than 60 bullets at a group of kids. Our children are growing up not seeing value in their own lives, thus thinking nothing of taking the lives of others.

One of the imams at Nick’s funeral read an African proverb: “The child who is not embraced by the village will burn it down just to feel its warmth.” This is what we are witnessing. We have lost our village mentality, and the price is catastrophic.

Gun violence is a symptom, not the cause. Systemic issues that plague our city and nation, combined with easy access to guns, are at the root. Generations of divestment, lack of social programming and equitable funding, and intergenerational trauma are presenting themselves through this violence among our youth. If you have no connection to district schools recently, you would not recognize what has become of them since the pandemic: the violence, the mental health, the hopelessness. It’s unbelievable and heartbreaking. Our children deserve better, and it’s our responsibility to provide it.

Everyone has a dog in this fight, regardless of what you think or where you live. We aren’t safe anywhere in this country. Bullets aren’t discerning and neither are those pulling the trigger. What skills do you have that could help our most vulnerable citizens to lead productive lives, instead of becoming shooters, victims, and those who aid fugitives?

Do you have time to volunteer with our youth, to show them there is hope and that life can be good? Everyone must make the time. We can’t afford not to.

Become a mentor, teach at-risk kids whatever skills you know, give them hope for a path forward. Volunteer in the arts, libraries, or athletics. There are children in elementary school with no access to books at home. Can you fix that? Teach adults how to read with literacy organizations. Go into prisons and help with GED programs, which will curb recidivism. Plant trees and gardens. Tree canopy is directly linked to criminal activity; the more trees and green spaces there are in a neighborhood, the less crime occurs. The opportunities are endless.

Everyone has something to offer. Gun violence will continue to keep us in a choke hold until everyone gets in the game and fights.

Meredith Elizalde is Nick’s mom. She works in higher education and is based in the Philly area.