Steve and Mia: How's this for igniting sexual desire: hypnosis

Q: After reading your column about the older woman's loss of sex drive, I'd like to add an additional idea, one that I use to create deep long-lasting pleasure for the lady: Have you ever tried hypnosis?

I have used it, creating pleasure for multiple orgasms, i.e. five, 10 or more in one evening. Being 65 and on blood pressure medication, I am no longer able to "perform," and have added this into the art of making "love" and giving the lady pleasure. I get a great amount of satisfaction from giving complete, honest pleasure to my partner.

Mia: If the loss of sex drive is for emotional rather than physical reasons, then hypnosis might help a person become less anxious or whatever. But five or 10 orgasms in an evening? I'm not buying that. Now, look into my eyes . . .

Steve: Hypnosis has been used by some clinicians in treating sexual dysfunction, but I wouldn't try it at home. I think less can go wrong with a vibrator.

Q: I'm the kind of person who would have oral sex with friends. It's not that sacred for me. I think my standards are low when it comes to who I'm attracted to. I think I'd have sex with anyone who would strike my fancy. When it comes to character, does this mean I'm a bad person?

Steve: I'm all for low standards. If it weren't for low standards, no one would've hooked up with me when I was in college. Not to mention that the great majority of human beings would never reproduce. We'd die out as a species.

But as one matures, things such as love, mutual respect and the character of the person you're attracted to become important factors. And you learn that you can have a quality friendship with someone even without oral sex.

Mia: What matters is whether you're comfortable with how

you're expressing yourself sexually. As long as you're OK with your lifestyle and you're not hurting anyone, I won't pass judgment. You shouldn't need anyone to sign off on your freewheeling ways. Unless, of course, you're feeling a little guilty, eh?

Q: I'm appalled at Mia's response to the woman who discovered her husband texting his ex-girlfriend. Really, Mia, accidentally return a few texts or phone calls to the other woman? It sounds like you will be sneaking around just like your husband. She should concentrate on her marriage, not the other woman. She's a distraction, not the root of the problem. The wife can't drag her husband off anywhere he's not really willing to go, be it counseling or the mall! Please take time to think responsibly before responding.

Mia: Honey, please. It goes without saying that the real issue is the relationship. That's always where the focus should be. I'm all for counseling and trying to reconnect. But until that happens, I see nothing wrong with a spouse telling her husband's so-called "friend" to back off.

Steve: Texting an ex can be a problem or it can be nothing. I think we can all agree that discussing this out in the open is the best way to deal with it.

Steve is a 50-something married man who's been around the block. Mia is a younger, recently married woman with an all-together different attitude. They may not agree, but they have plenty of answers. For answers e-mail S&M@phillynews.com or write: S&M c/o Daily News, 400 N. Broad St., Philadelphia, PA 19130.