Philly Clout: Numbers confirm Sean Hannity doesn't prep

M AYBE YOU'VE heard talking head Sean Hannity validating Donald Trump's baseless claims of a "rigged" electoral process by referring to the fact that Mitt Romney received no votes - zero! - in dozens of Philadelphia divisions in the 2012 election.

Perhaps you saw Hannity blasting CNN's Brian Stelter on Twitter last month when he had the gall to question Hannity.

"Do u prep?" the Fox News host tweeted at Stelter, referring again to the lack of any Romney votes - none at all! - in some Philadelphia divisions four years ago.

In fact, not only is it true that no one voted for Romney in 50 divisions in 2012 - which even the Philly GOP acknowledges - but our in-house numbers-crunchers Dylan Purcell and John Duchneskie found that Romney received exactly a single vote in 99 divisions in 2012.

One vote, Sean!

And two votes in 98 divisions. Three votes in 81 divisions. Four votes in 67 divisions. Five votes in 65 divisions, etc. etc.

Point is, Romney got his butt whooped. Why? Democrats outnumber Republicans 7 to 1 in Philadelphia. This is not astrophysics, Sean.

Fast forward to the 2016 primary: 51 divisions recorded only one Republican vote. In 28 other divisions, absolutely no Republicans voted. Although registered Republicans are found in all 1,686 divisions in the city, we have 56 divisions with fewer than 10 registered Republicans, and some of those voters might be inactive.

All of which is to say: Yes, it is not only possible, it is expected that Romney wouldn't get a single vote in 2012 in 3 percent of the city's divisions.

Sorry, Sean, you haven't uncovered evidence of (mostly mythical) voter fraud. You're just kinda dumb. It's like u don't even prep. Why don't you go back to the dojo and work on your karate skillz?

It's 5:19 p.m. Wednesday. The phone rings. It's Jon Voight. He wants to talk to us about Donald Trump. Is this real life? Or did Clout mistakenly take the Ambien instead of the aspirin again?

We answer the phone. Indeed, it is the guy who was in Deliverance promoting the guy who was in The Apprentice, who, we suddenly remember, is running for president of the United States of America. What does it all mean?

We block out the newsroom jabbering and listen intently to Jon Voight's soothing, telephonic voice. We listen for answers. We hurriedly type down what he says, planning to decipher his words later to montage-ready classical music that implies a major turning point is imminent. If there is a code, Clout will break it.

"I can't even enunciate how important I think it is," Voight says of the presidential election between Trump, who Voight says has some sort of special "metabolism," and Hillary Clinton, who has pneumonia.

We find Voight reassuring.

"He's got tremendous stamina," Voight says of Trump. "He jumps across the country. He keeps it up every day."

Voight reminds us that things are bad under President Obama and will be better under President Trump.

"We have ISIS because of them, and we have terrorists spread across the world," Voight says of Obama and Clinton. "Something has got to be done."

After we hang up, we think: Gee, maybe Donald Trump really is the answer. Voight says he's a good guy. And Voight won an Academy Award.

But then we pick up the news release from Voight's handlers and notice something strange. It says "John Voight" - with an "h" in the first name. Then we remember that Seinfeld episode in which George Costanza was bragging about having bought Jon Voight's Chrysler LeBaron but it turned out to belong to some schmo named John Voight.

So which Voight were we speaking with? Now we don't know who to vote for. We just don't know.

Probably Gary Johnson.

Maybe District Attorney Seth Williams will survive the ongoing federal probe of his personal and political finances, but first he will have to survive the food at Joy Tsin Lau, the dim sum restaurant at 10th and Race streets where 100 lawyers and law students were sickened during a banquet last year.

The Asian Pacific American Bar Association of Pennsylvania, the Greater Philadelphia Chinese Restaurant Association and Center City Crime Victim Services are hosting a crime-prevention workshop there next week in response to recent burglaries and robberies targeting Chinese takeout joints and other Asian businesses and residences.

Scheduled attendees include Williams and other attorneys and law-enforcement officials.

Joy Tsin Lau, which has repeatedly failed to maintain basic food-safety standards over the years, was hit with another round of citations in January, when a Health Department inspector found jellyfish, duck and bean sprouts being held at temperatures of 50 degrees or more, according to our reporter Sam Wood.

In July, Wood reported that Joy Tsin Lau had passed several recent inspections with no major infractions.

Let's hope it stays that way. Seth already has enough problems on his plate.

Staff writers William Bender and Chris Brennan contributed

to this column. Tips: clout@philly.com