Cougar hunt: Mature women dating younger men say they are the prey

By Liz Doup

Sun Sentinel

(MCT)

Yeah, they date younger guys. But ...

"They hunt me."

"The irony of that is, I'm 41," says McGrath. "I'm certainly not any cougar's prize."

Yet he's now considered an authority on cougar culture. "People want me to talk about it and define it," he says.

But really, what's all the fuss?

Older guys have coveted younger flesh for centuries. We're so accustomed to the obvious mismatch — he's a wealthy troll; she's a fabulous fox — it doesn't raise eyebrows, let alone produce a CD.

So if older women want to date a guy who still fits into size-34 pants, why not?

And if older dudes don't get why older women pass them by, let a few women spell it out.

The 40-plus don't automatically pass men by because of age. They're turned off by their attitude and actions. And fat and flaccid doesn't do much for them, either.

'I HATE THAT WORD — COUGAR'

And that's just the beginning. The dude who thinks watching TV is an aerobic activity. Or is too tired for sex. Or still living his life like it's 1980.

Sorry, but not great date material for those post-40 and ready to go, go, go.

"Younger guys are more energetic, more adventuresome," she says. "They're not so set in their ways."

On a recent outing, she and her date went retro and watched a film at a drive-in while sipping wine.

"An older guy sitting for hours in a car might complain that his joints ache," she says, laughing.

They prefer a more cultivated atmosphere. More cultivated company.

Many are successful professionals. They make their own money. They run their own lives. Some have marriage and kids behind them. They're not looking for a diamond ring or a legal document.

They're not even looking, they insist.

"I don't need to go to bars," she says. "Men come up to me in the grocery store, at the gas station."

In her 50s, she won't date anyone under 40. But a 32-year-old approached her recently.

"He came up to me and said, 'You're beautiful,'" she says. "I told him, 'I'm old enough to be your mother.'"

"They're very aggressive," he says. "They'll grab your hand and ask if you have a girlfriend. They want me to dance with them. If they want you, they'll go after you."

NO MIND GAMES

What's the attraction for men?

Women quote their younger dates as saying this:

Older women know who they are and what they want. No wasting time or mind games. And then there's the sex.

Some women in their 40s are where guys are in their 20s, sexually speaking, says Martinson, who dates men in their 20s.

"I love it that I'm 43 and young guys tell me I'm in better shape than a 20-year-old," she says. "I have a lot of sexuality. I don't try to hide it."